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Alone

Isn't it funny how time seems to slip away so fast
One minute you're happy, the other you're sad
But if you give me one more chance
To show my love for you is true I'll stand by your side your whole life through
(If Life Is So Short-The Moffats)

Lagu itu mengalun pelan. Aku ingin mendengarkannya. Sebuah lagi anak SMP yang sanggup memerangkap rasaku. Lagu yang kudengar saat lebaran terakhir bersama mamaku.Kudendangkan diam-diam. Dan kudapati mataku berkabut dan suaraku pecah. Aku menangis. Aku tak bisa mendefinisikan rasa ini.

Kegelisahan, kesendirian, sepi dan sunyi larut dalam jejak waktu. Aku benar-benar sendiri baik dalam artian sebenanrya maupun dalam bahasa kiasan. Aku berusaha menjelaskan rasa ini. Berusaha menganggap bahwa ini hanyalah sebuah dramatisasi rasa. Tapi bukan. Ini bukan sebuah dramatisasi rasa. In adalah yang paling jujur dariku saat ini.

Aku benar-benar merasa sepi dan aku tak butuh seseorang datang memaniku. Aku benar-benar menikmati rasa negatif ini dengan sangat khidmat.

Comments

  1. maaf, gara-gara saya mi kemarin yang putar ini lagu di kamar...

    ReplyDelete
  2. ini karena kau tak menemaniku bermalam kemarin. kau tau sendirika di kost. seramnya mi itu.

    ReplyDelete

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